Child abuse is a tough topic to address, but it is a fact that many people aren’t even aware they are carrying the repercussions of physical, verbal, sexual and neglect abuse stemming from childhood. That is until they get comfortable in a relationship and then all the suppressed hell breaks loose.

Perpetual abuse

One may go along for decades before they are triggered by a comment made by the abuser or start getting strange headaches, or even panic attacks. It may take a professional therapist to help them see that they were actually abused, because it was so long ago and forgotten. They begin to realize they are attracting partners who were also abused and that makes for very toxic relationships. In a way they are subconsciously abusing themselves, because they were conditioned to believe they are in a word: unlovable.

Some signs of child abuse

• people-pleasing
• addictive tendencies
• neediness
• talking short & fast so as to not take up someone’s time
• talking in too soft a tone so some people can’t hear you
• inferiority complex
• low self worth/esteem
• self-medication
• escapism into gaming
• fear of judgment/criticism
• disassociation
• defensive
• unable to take compliments
• feeling tainted by the abuse & not good enough
• perfectionism
• over-achiever
• lack of boundaries
• toxicity in relationships
• self-conscious in being seen
• wallflower tendencies
• panic attacks
• narcissism
• self-sabotage
• demanding control of others
• PTSD symptoms
• strange illnesses

Defenseless in childhood

As children with developing brains we are in an Alpha state until about the age of seven which is the hypnosis state, so whatever we learn in those formidable years is crucial to our sense of self.

An abused child is treated as a thing and objectified rather than a fellow human and divine being who brings the much needed unconditional love into the lives of its parents. When that love is rejected, the child feels rejected.

What you can determine as an abused child is that the abuser was most likely abused, which is not an excuse; merely a fact in most cases.

Two ways to deal with the energies of child abuse

• internalized – feelings are inwardly repressed and cause self-harm to the person
• externalized – feelings are outwardly expressed and cause harm to another person

Two ways to go from child abuse

• as a healer who stops the cycle
• as a criminal who perpetuates the cycle

How to heal yourself

If you have some of the signs that you were abused as a child or already know you were, there is a part of you that needs your compassion and understanding: your inner child aspect/archetype.

If you are still in contact with the abuser, it is probably best to cut all ties with them, because they may never admit to it and their very presence may adversely affect you. You don’t need the abuser to take the blame, but you do need to cut emotional cords with them. Nor, do you need to forgive them, as they must do that for themselves; you only need to heal and reclaim your power.

As with any self-healing, it all about you and not the hurting party, because they are your feelings you’re dealing with – not theirs. And there is no judgement because that maintains emotional entanglement which doesn’t help.

All you need is you in the present moment listening to the feelings that rise up from the cellular memory of your inner child. Depending on the severity of the abuse it is best to have access to a naturalist/professional therapist who may recommend specific stress relieving supplements.

*Be very cautious of prescription meds as many have addictive properties and natural healing is best when possible. If you are already on them then check out the section below to help yourself wean from them.

Self-help tools

Healing happens in the present moment, because it is the only time we have access to and can control; not the past or future. Although by healing the present we set the stage for the future. It matters not when a hurtful event happened or if it is remembered; only that the feelings are released or transmuted to allow the pleasant feelings to take over.

In the instance of child abuse you are being the parent and treating your inner child with your care and compassion, so you can talk to them as such. As well, you would have developed survival skills in your early years, such as how to read the energy in a room to avoid a spanking.

Your inner protector aspect/archetype would have become over zealous and kept you down most of your life so you wouldn’t get in harm’s way and you may need to acknowledge it, too.

All the tools you need are available in my Super Self Mastery online course, so click the link below and start healing your inner child today. She or he is still trying to bring the love into your life in spite of the obstacles in their way and you can clear those.